Build Your Career From Your Future, Not Based On Your Past - That's the Recipe For Success

I have a big dream of becoming a badass career woman. I do. But whenever I even think about it, my past self starts mocking the vision of my future self. Does this strike a chord?

How will you ever get where you want to be and become who you dream of becoming if you don't get rid of your past self-image taunting you?

My past does not define my future. My past does not define who I want to become.

Read this on repeat.

Whether we try to do something we've never done before or something we failed at before, we usually go back to our past, looking for the answer if we can do it. We want to know: Should I even bother trying?

You might think that having proof that you failed in the past will save you time and effort. So why would you even bother trying when it's a fact that you already failed before?

Maybe to spare yourself from disappointment and failure? Remember how it feels to fail, be disappointed, and be crushed? No one wants to feel that way. Not trying seems like a smart move then, right? It's safer.

Yes, it is safer now. But long-term, it's not.

Your past is trying to protect you, but at the same time, it's actually stopping you from creating the future you want.

When you have a big dream, something you've never done before, it's pretty normal that you're scared. Your brain starts telling you it's not within your reach. It's impossible for you. So before you start working on your goal, you go back to your past, most of the time to those instances when you tried to do something new and failed. Then, you conclude you'll never be able to do that same thing again or even something similar. You tell yourself you're not good at it. You don't have what it takes. You tried it in the past, but it didn't work out, so there's no point trying again. As a result, you decide it's smarter to give up before even trying.

But why would you go to your past when you're trying to build your future. The future is not built upon the failures from your past. The only thing you should use your past for is to learn from your mistakes.

I had a client who wanted to create an entirely new career for herself, something she's always wanted to do, her dream job. To do that, she had to take a course, but she was hesitant. She kept thinking about her past, reminding herself how difficult it was when she attended college and had so many obligations. It was overwhelming for her. So, since she had a past experience of going to school being difficult, she projected it onto something she wanted to do in the future. She assumed it was going to be the same way this time. But, thinking about how it will be difficult is not helpful at all. Her past was stopping her from creating the future she wanted so badly. So, instead of focusing on her past, I wanted her to focus on her future. I wanted her to visualize herself doing the job she loves in the future. I wanted her to imagine how it'd feel, how it'd affect her life and the people around her once she's already there.

When your WHY is so strong, it's more difficult for your brain to return to your past. Instead, you're coming up with the solutions on how to do it differently this time to succeed. The right questions are, "How can you do it differently this time around?" "What can help you do it more easily?" "What other ways can you try that'll work?" The point here is to learn from your past and not bring back all those negative feelings that will stop you from taking action.

Just a slight shift in perspective and the way we think can create huge results for us.

You might wonder, "How the hell does she know that?" So, let me share my story of how one bad experience in the past created a huge obstacle in moving forward with building my coaching business.

Around 7 years ago, I was a part of a video campaign for the company I'm working for. My role was to answer some questions about the company and share my experience working there. When the camera went on, I immediately froze and almost chickened out. I was so nervous that I couldn't even remember what I said in the video. I felt so uncomfortable throughout the whole process, but I got it done. I did it, and I was proud of myself.

I was checking if the video was published every day. I was excited to see the final product and how I ended up looking in the video. Little did I know what would happen in the end. Once the shooting and editing were done, they published the campaign. The moment I heard it was published, I ran to my laptop, excited to play the video and see my face in it. I played the whole video from beginning to end. Then I did it again. Maybe there's another video...searching...nope, no other videos. So, where am I? Where's my part? I was surprised and shocked to see that my part was missing. I don't have to tell you how disappointed and hurt I was.

As it turned out, only 3 people were not included, and yes, I was one of them. Apparently, my voice was shaky, so they decided it was better to cut out my part. I was truly disappointed in myself. It was supposed to be such an "easy" task, and I couldn't do it. I failed. I felt like a failure. The whole experience was so painful that I promised myself I'll never do it again. From that moment on, I created a belief that "I am not good at talking in front of the camera. It's something I should definitely avoid from now on."

So, 6 years later, here I am, having a dream of having a coaching business, building my Instagram profile, and feeling so enthusiastic and excited. But once I realized that the next step was actually creating video content and letting people get to know me, I felt the same way I felt 6 years ago. Terrified. Terrified at the thought of having to go through the same uncomfortable experience with the end result - FAILURE. I was afraid to even practice. It took me around 6 months to work on my limiting belief, get coached, and change my perspective to start practicing and finally do it. I did it! I was so proud of myself once I did it. It felt amazing. I felt like I could do anything I set my mind to.

Was it perfect? Not even close. Was it good enough? Yes! This experience taught me to let go of striving for perfectionism, especially when practicing and learning a new skill.

And here's how coaching helped me change my limiting belief and encouraged me to take action:

• The first step was gaining awareness that one bad experience in the past doesn't mean I can't do it.

• Then, acknowledging that some skills are easier to learn, and some might take some time, such as making a video for me.

• Next, you need to be willing to try and fail many times until it gets better and better.

• Also, be willing to feel all those negative emotions, such as disappointment, doubt, hopelessness, and fear but still do it.

• Finally, be aware of why you're doing it - what you want to achieve is way more important than the obstacle. When your WHY and vision are so strong, nothing can stop it.

When you're about to do something you've never done before, do it from the future, not your past.

Your capability to do something is not determined by your past activities. Instead, it's determined by your will to learn a new skill, practice, and become better. It's determined by who you want to become and what you want to achieve.

So what would you rather do, be stuck in the past or dare to create the future you dream about? The choice is yours.